Skip to content

Church of the Undead

Church of the Undead published on No Comments on Church of the UndeadPurchase

At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from top to bottom.  The earth shook, and the rocks were split.  The tombs also were opened, and many bodies of the saints who had fallen asleep were raised.  After his resurrection they came out of the tombs and entered the holy city and appeared to many.  Now when the centurion and those with him, who were keeping watch over Jesus, saw the earthquake and what took place, they were terrified and said, “Truly this man was God’s Son!”

Matthew 27:52-54

Many church fathers wrote about this tiny little incident, only mentioned in the Gospel of Matthew, wherein the zombie apocalypse commenced.  These church fathers help us theologically interpret Matthew’s narrative.  For instance, Gregory of Nazianzus (330-389 AD) says, “He lays down his life, but He has the power to take it again; and the veil rent, for the mysterious doors of Heaven are opened, the rocks are cleft, the dead arise.  He dies but he gives life, and by his death destroys death.  He is buried, but He rises again.  He goes down to Hell, but He brings up the souls; He ascends to Heaven, and shall come again to judge the quick and the dead…”  What’s theologically significant in Matthew is that Jesus’ DEATH conquers death…not just his resurrection.  Jesus’ death destroys the holy border that kept Israel from God’s presence.  Jesus’ death sets the captives free from Hell.  This text is connected to the idea that Jesus broke into Hell and set loose all the saints who had died before he came to earth.

Protestant Reformer John Calvin notes some of the logical questions raised by Matthew’s wording and timeline, writing,

“This was a particular portent in which God testified that His Son had entered death’s prison, not to stay there shut up, but to lead all free who were held captive… That is the reason why He, who was soon to be shut in a tomb opened the tombs elsewhere.  Yet we may doubt whether this opening of the tombs happened before the resurrection, for the resurrection of the saints…followed, in my opinion, the resurrection of Christ.  It is absurd for some interpreters to image that they spent three days alive and breathing, hidden in tombs.  It seems likely to me that at Christ’s death the tombs at once opened; at His resurrection some of the godly men received breath and came out and were seen in the city.  Christ is called the Firstborn from the dead… This reasoning agrees very well, seeing that the breaking of the tombs was the presage of new life, and the fruit itself, the effect, appears three days later, as Christ rising again led other companions from the graves with Himself.  And in this sign it was shown that neither His dying nor His resurrection were private to himself, but breathe the odor of life into all the faithful.”

That’s beautiful, Calvin…and probably my favorite explanation of all the one’s I’ve read.  But I want to know the rest of the story!!!  Matthew DOES say that the bodies were raised the moment Christ died, but they didn’t appear to anyone until after the resurrection.  Matthew leaves us guessing about what happened to all these undead.  Did they move in with their ancestors?  Did they crumble back into dust, and if so, what was the point?  Did they take off into the sky with Jesus when he ascended, which would have been mentioned, I think?  Do they continue to roam the earth, lurking in your church shadows late at night, long past the point of remembering what it means to love others the way Christ loves them, mumbling, “Weeeeev nevvvrrrrr donnnn ittttt thaattttt wayyyy beforrrrrrr……”

 Lest anyone fear this is a comic judging old people, it’s actually a comic judging ANYONE who’s religion is more focused on external appearances and self-importance.  You may not be devouring actual brains, but your zombie ways are feeding off the heart and soul of Christ’s movement.  And by you, I sometimes mean me, because it’s surprisingly easy for all of us to fall into these patterns of self-serving religion…

Transcribe Comic Cancel

Your email address will not be published.

Leave a Reply

Primary Sidebar